322 pointsby dmschulman9 hours ago35 comments
  • an0malous7 hours ago
    It's great except the war is obviously for Israel not oil, we had more access to oil before the war
    • lopsotronic5 hours ago
      I think it might be even worse than that. It's a war for nothing at all.

      A defense analyst said, "we can't be sure that the administration has met their war aims" and it made me scream at the radio. What aims? They didn't even bother making something up. At least Bush 2 respected us well enough to lie. I have no idea what any of this is supposed to accomplish.

      You're watching a nuclear power putter around a marina with fifty brawling toddlers climbing all over the tiller.

      • tim33313 minutes ago
        Various potential aims have been mentioned - stop nukes, regime change, support the protestors, stop support for Hamas and the like. The trouble is none of it seems planned out or able to achieve them.
      • Henchman214 hours ago
        Once again I’ll say: the purpose is clear, you just don’t want to admit it. The point is to destroy the US.
    • namuol7 hours ago
      Oil prices going up is “good” for petrol states who aren’t blocked.

      But yeah fair callout about Israel.

    • han17 hours ago
      They say Palantir israeli good software ;)
    • epistasis6 hours ago
      Well oil is frequently trotted out as a reason to do this, so we certainly can't take oil out of the discussion, whether it feels like it's an obvious bad reason or not.

      It's been all throughout the news throughout March and April, here's some examples (please excuse the LLM summary, but summarizing lots of repetitive news links is actually one thing that LLMs do not hallucinate on often):

      > March 29-30, 2026: Trump told the Financial Times that his "preference would be to take the oil" and discussed seizing Kharg Island, which handles over 90% of Iran's oil exports.

      > April 3, 2026: In a social media post, he claimed that with more time, the U.S. could "OPEN THE HORMUZ STRAIT, TAKE THE OIL, & MAKE A FORTUNE".

      > April 6, 2026: At the White House Easter Egg Roll, Trump told reporters, "If I had my choice, I'd keep the oil," but noted that he hadn't fully done so because he wanted to "make the people of our country happy" who wanted the war to end

      March 29 - https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/trump-says-pre...

      April 3 - Trump posting on social media https://uk.news.yahoo.com/trump-makes-cryptic-social-media-2...

      April 6 - https://www.politico.com/news/2026/04/06/trump-says-he-would...

      • an0malous6 hours ago
        They’ve also said it was to stop their nuclear weapons program, the same program they said they destroyed at the beginning of the year.

        They additionally said it was to free the Iranian people from the oppressive regime, and later said we would end their civilization if they don’t agree to a cease fire.

        I’m sure obtaining their oil is a goal, but it’s not their primary goal.

        • epistasis6 hours ago
          Well even "a" goal is a big change from "obviously not".

          Historians will debate the true reasons for this invasion, but in the end I think they'll conclude it's just the random actions of a very incompetint and not very intelligent person that acts with pure id.

          • an0malous5 hours ago
            If I go to the supermarket for groceries and fill up the gas in my car to get there, my goal wasn’t to get gas, it was to get groceries.

            The historians are already saying this war is for Israel, that’s what John Mearsheimer and Jeffrey Sachs are saying. I’m sure the companies that produce the textbooks will find a way to say how it’s all rather more complicated than that though.

    • captainbland7 hours ago
      I mean it's not clear the current state of things was the ambition before the war, a while back they were talking about seizing Kharg island which indicates capturing oil resources was an objective
      • athrowaway3z6 hours ago
        No - it indicates gross incompetence of the people in charge of the war and its communication.

        Any media worth its salt spend a brief time explaining why invading Kharg would mean mass US casualties, while having no critical objectives only achievable by seizing Kharg.

        If one of your media sources only echoed "reports of the US looking to seize Kharg island" without that context it was wasting your time for attention.

      • an0malous6 hours ago
        The oil is a secondary objective to keep markets stable so there’s less dissent domestically, the primary objective is to weaken Iran so that Israel can continue their expansion in the Middle East with less resistance. Their goal for decades now has been to become a world power like the US, Russia, and China and they manipulate US foreign policy to achieve these aims. This isn’t even a secret, you could read the Clean Break memo or read Israeli news where they talk about this somewhat openly.

        The war will continue at least up to elections, maybe longer since Zionism has bipartisan support in the US, but they’ll at least have to change the messaging or approach somehow. These ceasefire negotiations are a farce and will invariably fall through. The US will get no benefits and the spin will be how incompetent the Trump administration is for creating another quagmire but there was never anything for the US to gain from this and the real objective of exhausting the US military resources to undermine Iran will have been achieved. They ideally would still like to install the descendant of the last Shah as the new prime minister, but if that can’t be accomplished they’ll just reset the Iranian civilization back 20 years by destroying infrastructure, oil fields, and killing influential and popular leaders.

        The only redeeming factor of the Trump admin is that they are genuinely incompetent so this hidden hand influencing our foreign policy is more apparent but they’re not so incompetent to have started a war they have nothing to gain from.

      • engineer_226 hours ago
        Trump meeting with China this week, China maybe part of the calculus
  • adriand8 hours ago
    Wow - the writing in this is fantastic. This is genuinely hilarious!
  • chabes7 hours ago
    Why was this removed from the front page? It was number one just a couple minutes ago
    • timeisapear5 hours ago
      I think we need an official HN response. This is a legitimate video game, which happens to be satire. If we as a community cannot handle this, I don't know if I want to be a part of it anymore, even though I've been here since 2014.
    • fyrn_7 hours ago
      Can't rock the boat too much, when the captain has a lot of money
    • ffsm85 hours ago
      Political satire. People who take themselves and their political alignment too seriously will inevitably flag it.
    • tolerance7 hours ago
      This is one of those submissions that will invariably descend into a flame war if someone dare criticize it and infringe upon the consensus joy of others.
    • fallingmeat7 hours ago
      here for this comment
  • namuol7 hours ago
    Is this post shadow-flagged or something? It’s off the front page.
    • veeti3 hours ago
    • namuol6 hours ago
      Okay it’s now explicitly marked as flagged at least
    • sph4 hours ago
      They needed to make room for more AI posts
    • insane_dreamer2 hours ago
      go to /active

      I stopped visiting the HN front page months ago, when all the absurd over-flagging started to happen

    • ge967 hours ago
      makes sense political
      • chabes6 hours ago
        Political doesn’t equal not relevant to HN
        • Freedom25 hours ago
          It's generally not curious discussion however, which is a pillar of this community.
    • teslawasright5 hours ago
      [dead]
  • jryio7 hours ago
    Who remembers the Newgrounds games making fun of Bush during the Iraq war?
  • JKCalhoun7 hours ago
    Here's hoping there are expansion packs (and that Mexico will pay for them).
  • lbrito8 hours ago
    I was unsure if this was a legit propaganda piece for the first few seconds!
  • NDlurker6 hours ago
    Hilarious. I played through it twice. I think I found everything except for the vial of measles. Maybe it was never meant to be found hahaha
  • sailfast7 hours ago
    "Hold Hands" > GAME OVER
  • baggachipz7 hours ago
    Absolutely brilliant and I'm amazed at how current it is. Huge kudos to the developer.
  • tofuahdude7 hours ago
    Anyone finish burning the files yet?

    I tried... but it looked like it would take awhile...

  • dwa35927 hours ago
    I decided to get the diet coke and call it "enough" for the day.
  • dethos2 hours ago
    This is genuinely funny. Spot on.
  • yndoendo7 hours ago
    For what MAGA views as good for the USA is actually a deplorable loss for the civilized world.
  • egorfine8 hours ago
    Excellent. I remember King Quest, Larry Quest and the rest and it immediately gave me the same nostalgic vibes.
    • lorecore7 hours ago
      They were actually called Kings Quest and Leisure Suit Larry. There was also Police Quest and Space Quest. Sierra Online really had some of the canonical adventure game series.
  • 7 hours ago
    undefined
  • TarqDirtyToMe7 hours ago
    This would be perfect on a play date
    • 7 hours ago
      undefined
  • sarthak_sachdev7 hours ago
    I should have gone ahead with the diet coke
  • jcpham26 hours ago
    this game has been deployed IRL to arcade cabinets and troops have been spotted playing the cabinets

    source: https://i.redd.it/v5dmdpof1q0h1.jpeg

  • LetsGetTechnicl8 hours ago
    I can't believe we're so beyond parody at this point. Also, instant game over from trying to hold Melania's hand lol
    • epistasis7 hours ago
      Try again, fighting the Pope is worth it.
      • nosrepa7 hours ago
        Wait, I thought the game just loops and you're stuck getting lube.
        • alistairSH6 hours ago
          You get lube the first time, then collect TP (and fight the pope to get one oll of TP). Then back to lube, but slightly different. I stopped there.
    • mschuster917 hours ago
      Idiocracy was supposed to be a warning, the GOP took it as an instruction manual.
      • daft_pink7 hours ago
        It’s the easiest way to make money!
  • numpad07 hours ago

      > Error
      > Your browser does not allow to read local files.
    
    WHAT
    • consp7 hours ago
      It's rpgmaker which might use the "local storage api" for some state management depending on the exact version.
  • dlev_pika7 hours ago
    It’s so hard to parody these mfers, like AJ - no matter how outrageous, could very well fit in their actual week
  • han17 hours ago
    I think we know why Trump needs three barrels of lube... for his best friendstein!
  • avaer8 hours ago
    For context, this is made by https://www.thesecrethandshake.com/, the same group behind the Trump + Epstein statue at the National Mall.
  • tt_dev8 hours ago
    love the music
  • ge967 hours ago
    Man no ball room?
    • general14657 hours ago
      If Iran would have ball room, Khomeini would be still alive.
  • input_sh6 hours ago
    Does the game just loop? I got the lube, then the TP, then the lube again, then the TP again...

    I mean it'd make sense for it to loop, but I'm just wondering if I'm missing something or should I just call it there.

  • christkv7 hours ago
    Reminds me of that Alex Jones shooter
  • jansan7 hours ago
    I know this is frowned upon on HN, so feel free to vote me down.

    But it only works on Firefox for me, not on Chrome.

    Error Message on Chrome:

        Error: Failed to initialize graphics.
        at SceneManager.initGraphics (rmmz_managers.js:1957:15)
        at SceneManager.initialize (rmmz_managers.js:1929:10)
        at SceneManager.initialize (CGMZ_Core.js:1662:41)
        at SceneManager.run (rmmz_managers.js:1918:14)
        at Main.onEffekseerLoad (main.js:150:22)
        at _onRuntimeInitialized (effekseer.min.js:35:44)
        at effekseer.min.js:35:327
        at Module.onRuntimeInitialized (effekseer.min.js:15:164351)
        at doRun (effekseer.min.js:15:164904)
        at run (effekseer.min.js:15:165064)
    • barnabee7 hours ago
      > it only works on Firefox for me, not on Chrome

      Sounds like a feature, not a bug

    • kg7 hours ago
      Try going to chrome://gpu and looking for red text or error messages
  • throwawaylizard5 hours ago
    [dead]
  • tamimio7 hours ago
    [flagged]
    • anonzzzies7 hours ago
      trump is not done yet. don't worry.
    • malcolmgreaves7 hours ago
      Blatantly not true. Do you parrot such lies to seek attention?
      • tamimio7 hours ago
        Go and ask your LLM of choice, and get back to me. Have this quick recap:

        >bush

        Created two wars, direct deaths and enabled ones are 500k to 1M, $4-$6 trillion cost, it destroyed iraq and Afghanistan.

        >obama

        No new wars, cont previous plus libya plus drones strikes in the region (check how many kids killed in those), 100k-200k deaths, $1-$2 trillion, destroyed libya, yemen, syria, plus iraq/afghanistan

        >biden

        We all saw what was going on in gaza (~50k killed) and still paid billions to israel

        Meanwhile trump had doha deal, reduced spending and pulled military from there. Hate trump for whatever reason you had that’s your own (maybe justified in domestic stuff), but the fact that what he did in that region is nothing compared to what previous presidents did, and unhinged tweets don’t count.

  • simianparrot7 hours ago
    [flagged]
    • kridsdale17 hours ago
      If the Democratic party were smart or had even a single drop of Rizz, it would be them.

      So we know that it isn’t.

      • goosejuice6 hours ago
        Charisma clearly cuts both ways.
    • 5424587 hours ago
      Are you implying that this must be funded by some shadowy group? I don’t see why, people independently make media mocking politicians all the time.
      • simianparrot6 hours ago
        Yeah but they don’t erect statues like this group does
    • dlev_pika7 hours ago
      Soros and IRGC duh!
    • wiseowise7 hours ago
      Zionists, left and immigrants who want to destroy the big, beautiful country.
      • mschuster917 hours ago
        If there is one coalition that wants to destroy everything the US stood for ever since WW2 it is the modern-day GOP.
      • saltyoldman7 hours ago
        Zionists would be a confusing one to be in this list.
      • sixothree7 hours ago
        Are you sure it's not the globalists?
    • 7 hours ago
      undefined
    • saltyoldman7 hours ago
      China, Russia
  • moralestapia7 hours ago
    [flagged]
    • shimman7 hours ago
      How do you feel about the President mocking Jesus and the teachings of Christ? Do you choose to not engage in any business inside the US or do you just hold your outrage until it's convenient to express?
      • john_strinlai7 hours ago
        answering this would require battling probably the most serious cognitive dissonance the poster has faced in their lifetime, so i would not hold your breath while you wait for a reply.
    • YeahThisIsMe7 hours ago
      He'll be fine.
    • jwmoz7 hours ago
      Not a fan of free speech?
      • moralestapia7 hours ago
        The opposite. I'm a free speech absolutist, as Musk would say :).
        • malcolmgreaves7 hours ago
          You’re a fan of the political party whose leader insults and mocks the pope. Literally insulting the person who is channeling the word of the Lord. Why do you support those that deeply insult Jesus?
          • aipatselarom7 hours ago
            Chill. GP never said he was against or in favor of the current US administration. This is quite a deranged strawman argument that borders on a personal attack.

            This behavior does not lead to clever or constructive conversation. There are much better ways to get your point across.

            It feels weird to have to write this but it seems warranted: A religious preference is something that extends beyond the limited time and space of a US political party.

            • pear017 hours ago
              Except a cursory glance at their comment history shows otherwise. You could have put in some basic effort.

              Also don't insult our intelligence. It's pretty clear what side of the partisan line someone who says both - "I'm a free speech absolutist" citing Musk while in the same breath complaining someone is being mean to Jesus - is on.

              Maybe you are simply projecting some guilt about your electoral choices. I can't come up with a better reason for your comment beyond empty moral posturing.

            • jmye7 hours ago
              > deranged [...] that borders on a personal attack.

              He says, unironically.

              > This behavior does not lead to clever or constructive conversation.

              He says, unironically.

              Physician, heal thyself.

            • john_strinlai7 hours ago
              certainly off-topic and unlikely to lead to clever/construction conversation!

              nothing about it is deranged, a strawman, or a borderline personal attack though.

              >GP never said he was against or in favor of the current US administration

              they have, actually! i quote: "I personally like Trump as a president."

              • aipatselarom7 hours ago
                I'm happy to clarify but also please don't take it personal if this is my last comment wrt. to this; again, this does not really lead us to productive conversation and we can all do much better than that.

                All definitions come from Google's AI summary, of course we can argue about those but I think they are pretty accurate.

                deranged argument: a "deranged argument" refers to intensely illogical, paranoid, orpathological reasoning that often disrupts rational public discourse, characterized by extreme, often toxic, comparisons. It seems to me like that label is warranted, GP just wrote "I don't like that the game mocks Jesus" and got a somehow extreme response that I would definitely characterize as an "extreme, toxic comparison".

                strawman: a dishonest debating tactic where someone misrepresents, exaggerates, or fabricates an opponent's argument to make it easier to attack. In this case, GP wrote "I don't like that the game mocks Jesus", whereas the discussion was turned by some people into "I like the Trump administration".

                Criticizing someone because of their political and religious preferences (and nothing else) is as personal as you can get. Most laws against harassment around the world specifically point out this behavior.

                YMMV, if you consider this to not be relevant, it's actually ... ok. We all have different points of view and even "logical" things might seem illogical to others and I mean this honestly and without snark. We don't have to agree, the best I (we) can do is to thoroughly explain our points of view.

                • mindslight6 hours ago
                  There's really no need to steelman here. If you click the poster's comment history, this is on the very first page: "I personally like Trump as a president". So the post was nothing more than the same old pattern of selectively-applied ideals. At this point, thinking there must be some nuance or 4d chess behind this kind of criticism is just foolish.
          • czottmann7 hours ago
            Stop with the logic and whatnot
        • mindslight7 hours ago
          Are you saying this with an awareness that you're calling yourself a hypocrite? I'm not trying to attack you here, just pointing out the common understanding of Musk's "free speech absolutism".
    • mihok7 hours ago
      Because they were both doctors?
    • lbrito7 hours ago
      The Trump administration does it all the time, so you can't really have a Trumpian game without that, can you?
    • SirFatty7 hours ago
      "This was fun until the mocking of Jesus."

      Are you referring to Trump?

      • vunderba7 hours ago
        Now now. He was clearly being depicted as a doctor - couldn't you tell from the glowing orbs of light in his hands? /s
    • SimianSci7 hours ago
      Jesus doesn't care, and neither should you.
      • ge967 hours ago
        He did but we mounted his ass to a cross

        (I'm not religious)

        Was thinking about the dumb animalistic shit we've done like burning Joan of Arc for wearing men's clothes

    • periodjet7 hours ago
      [flagged]
      • kg7 hours ago
        Your deity of choice can most likely survive being mocked with no harm sustained whatsoever, being a supernatural entity beyond human comprehension. He/she/it might get angry with you, which is a good reason to personally choose not to mock supernatural entities or religious figures.

        On the other hand, antisemitic slurs or other attacks on oppressed groups can result in real emotional and physical harms against real living people, your neighbors, your coworkers, your friends, even your family.

  • avador7 hours ago
    epicfurious.com is blocked by my service provider. It’s a small, local, fiber company called mornington.

    They do not say why in the returned html.

    I do not approve of such blockage.

    Nevertheless. Knowledge is knowledge. So I post for everyone’s sake.

    • epistasis7 hours ago
      I was going to say that political censorship is out of control in the US, but that appears to be a Canadian ISP?
    • mschuster917 hours ago
      A DNS WHOIS [1] shows what's likely the cause:

      > Important Dates: Created 4/28/2026

      Many an ISP these days blocks domains that have been registered less than a month ago because most scam campaigns have to cycle through domains way faster than that time.

      Check if you have enabled some sort of "malware protection" at your ISP, because that usually is based on DNS filtering.

      [1] https://who.is/whois/epicfurious.com

      • avador7 hours ago
        Useful - thank you. I will contact them.
  • znpy6 hours ago
    Flagging this as off-topic according to guidelines:

    > Off-Topic: Most stories about politics, or crime, or sports, or celebrities, unless they're evidence of some interesting new phenomenon. If they'd cover it on TV news, it's probably off-topic.