https://sandeepbansod.medium.com/why-your-docker-container-i...
Switching to debian reduced it to microseconds.
Does anyone here know what I was doing wrong with alpine?
Too many weird edge cases to deal with, especially related to Alpine using musl libc instead of glibc.
At best, your builds are slower.
At worst, certain code paths are broken.
Golang gives you a web server as a staticly linked binary.
If the question is "I need to containerize my Node app, how do I make it small?" the answer can't be "don't containerize it and don't use Node".